Just about every day you can hear or read about a study saying how childhood obesity is on the rise, kids don't get enough exercise, and how Americans are viewed as lazy by the rest of the world. Well, could it possibly be because of worthless products like these that promote laziness? Technology and automation is great in most cases, but human brain power should really be used for things more important than figuring out how to avoid stirring your own chocolate milk.
Automatic Sucker Spinners
How in the world is twirling a sucker in your mouth so strenuous that a battery-powered sucker spinner is needed!? Ridiculous! Besides, when you press the sucker too hard against the roof of your mouth or tongue, it stops spinning. Even if it did work well, it would still be a waste of money. If you can't turn your own lollipop, then you don't deserve to have a lollipop to begin with!
Microwave S'mores Maker
Someone must have been completely off their rocker when this was invented. As if making s'mores in the microwave isn't lazy enough already, this little s'mores maker will set the graham cracker on top for you. Place your graham cracker on the arms and then lower the arms down on top of the marshmallow. Right, because it is soooo difficult to place a graham cracker on top yourself. The arms can also hold down the graham cracker on top of the marshmallow in case squeezing the s'more together is too strenuous for you.
Moo Mixer Self-stirring Mug
It would be terrible to go through the hassle of getting a spoon and having to stir chocolate into milk. It would be horrendous for arm muscles to get a little bit of use stirring for a few seconds. It would be so cool to have such a chunky mug that looks like a cow. I hate milk, I hate cow print, I hate worthless products...I hate the Moo Mixer.
Motorized Ice Cream Cone
Why? Why would someone need a self-turning ice cream cone? Laziness. There really is no other answer. I don't think any battery-powered product that supposedly makes eating or drinking easier is necessary for able bodied persons. Except for beer bongs. Sometimes you need the height and help of a tube to get it all down quickly.
Actually, most of those are kid's products. Except the microwave s'more maker. That's just lazy.