The 2009 Miss America Pageant is just two days away. What? You didn't even know that? Well, neither did most people. This is probably partly due to no one caring and also because it is no longer aired on a major network. In case you want to set your TiVo, this year's pageant will air Saturday, January 24 at 8:00 PM EST on TLC.
When I say "Miss America Pageant", you say what? I'm going to take a guess what words or quick thoughts come to mind when someone mentions this pageant or the Miss USA, Miss Teen USA, or Miss Universe pageants. Heck, any beauty pageant for that matter!
Thought #1: Tanking ratings.
There's a reason (or two or ten) why the Miss America Pageant is on a cable network on a Saturday night. Enough said.
Thought #2: Fake.
The interview round is stupid. Actually, so is the swimsuit round, the evening wear round, and the talent round. They are asked about situations that a beauty queen cannot even solve. The responses are always fake and do not qualify as valuable answers with substance. It reminds me of trying to BS your way through an essay question in school. You have no idea what you're talking about, but you hope that if you ramble on long enough you'll get by.
Thought #3: Useless.
What is the actual purpose of beauty pageants? Sure, the contestants are involved in charity work, but why the need for a competition, sashes, crowns, swimsuits, evening gowns, dance routines, and talent shows? Doesn't applying to college and for scholarships take care of encouraging young people to get involved in a cause, whether they genuinely want to or not? Maybe I'm missing the underlying value in these pageants, but probably not. With all the reality trash that is on TV, it could be much worse and much more useless. Mama's Boys, I'm looking at you.
Thought #4: Makeup.
Some of these girls are actually beautiful. Others would probably scare you half to death if they didn't have all of that makeup, a spray tan, and hair spray. Those lights and cameras aren't always very forgiving! Looking at many of the contestant's photos, I've decided that most of these girls who are barely in their 20's look much older than that. That's not going to be good when they are 40! I imagine many of them have been wearing loads of makeup since they were toddlers and their moms made them enter pageants. Right, because a 3-year-old actually wants to be in a pageant.
Thought #5: Will anyone fall?
I honestly feel terrible when anyone falls in front of others. However, with those shiny stages, tall heels, and long dresses, it's bound to happen to some of them. They have to keep eye contact with the camera and judges, so it's not like they can really pay all that much attention to where they are walking. In both 2008 and 2007 at the Miss Universe Pageant, Miss USA (not to be confused with Miss America) has taken a fall during the evening gown competition. I give them credit for getting right back up, keeping a smile, and not crying on the spot with embarrassment. We'll have to wait until later this summer to find out if Miss USA goes three for three in the falling competition.
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