Screwnicorn: The Unicorn Corkscrew
Finally, a unicorn corkscrew!
We're not going to beat around the bush. The only reason we're selling this product is because of its name. "Screwnicorn", like the mythical creature for which it is named, is pure linguistic magic.
While perfectly capable of opening bottles of wine, we suspect the true intent behind the creation of the Screwnicorn was to give us all a fantastic new noun and verb.
With the unicorn corkscrew, you're not opening a bottle of wine; you're screwnicorning it. Buy yours today...before your friends do!
Features & specs
- Dimensions: 3.75" x 2.25" x 1.25"
- Works just like a regular corkscrew
- Does not create rainbows when operated (sorry!)
At long last! The Unicorn Corkscrew!
As legend would have it, the mighty Unicorn could only be tamed by the charms of a virgin.
Thankfully, the Screwnicorn is not so picky. This corkscrew unicorn will allow any interested party to wield its magical bottle-opening powers.
Frequently Asked Questions
Question: So...it's a corkscrew that looks like a unicorn?
Answer: You bet your arse it is.
Question: Ooookay, so why are you selling it?
Answer: Because "Screwnicorn" is probably the best name for a product...ever...except possibly for Flickin' Chicken.
Question: What you're saying is that if it wasn't called "Screwnicorn", you may not sell it?
Answer: Now we're on the same page.
Question: Other than opening bottles of wine and looking like a unicorn, what does the Screwnicorn do?
Answer: It lets you call it "Screwnicorn". And that, my friend, is worth the price of admission.
Question: Is the Screwnicorn more adept at opening bottles of wine than a traditional corkscrew?
Answer: No. But it goes without saying that "Screwnicorning" your bottle of wine is infinitely more awesome than corkscrewing it. This is now the part of the show where you click the "Add to Cart" button!
This product has been discontinued. Frown face!
Burning Questions: You Ask, We Answer
Want to ask your own Burning Question?
Unfortunately, this product is not currently available for purchase. Therefore, we cannot accept any new burning questions. Sorry!